About Being Horrible
Ever been horrible? Sure you have. I’m not letting myself off the hook on this one, so I’m not going to let you sneak out the back either. When I mean horrible, I mean said or did something so contrary to the laws of God and Man that it inflicts physical pain to think about it. So if you think the worst thing you’ve ever done is leave the dog in the car for one minute too long or, I don’t know, maybe forgot to say “I love you” to your significant other, get outta here.
We’re going deep. Now tap the breaks. Not talking criminal stuff, not saying you or I are murderers or anything, but I am talking about the almost regular horrible crap that people do to each other. It can be one of those sins of omission, like driving by a homeless person and not giving a dump. Let’s go deeper. You drive by the poor guy and he’s dragging a cart behind him, and not only do you not help or give a crap—you actually get mad at the guy in some weird way. Not saying you do anything to the dude, but even if it’s for a second, you get pissed that whatever derelictions of duty he’s done have now caused you to have to see him, spoiling the ride to your comfortable home. You’re not trying to have the thought—it just happens. You try to pretend it didn’t happen—hopefully you forget about it, but sometimes you can’t shake it.
It’s a thought that passes through your head. It’s frigging horrible. And hey, maybe I’m just a nutjob, but I’m willing to bet that everybody has these little moments and thoughts.
Now that we’ve established that I’m a jerk, maybe we can all just get real. Honestly, and this could totally be taken the wrong way, I think it’s kind of hilarious how much we lie to ourselves about the terrible crap we pull. Take religion out of the equation, but not reality, not reason, not morality. We’ve all got morals. I know a lot of relativists out there, but they can’t intellectually live up to their belief system. If they can, I haven’t heard it argued in anything resembling a convincing fashion.
So what the hell am I going on about? Good question. I’m talking about having the decency to know that a lot of the time, you’re capable of some pretty crappy stuff. Like I said, take the religious overtones out, and try this one on. I’m paraphrasing, maybe Pascal, I don’t know, someone smarter than me: “There are no saints that don’t believe they are sinners; there are no sinners who don’t believe they are saints.” Of course, nobody’s all sinner or saint, but it’s freaking hyperbole people. Philosophy and comedy both work off of hyperbole, that’s why I always say that if you can’t take a joke you can’t learn a damn thing, either. There’s work to be done. It’ll never stop, and what, you think you’re in danger of becoming too darn good? Now that’s a joke.
I know I’m usually a goofball and completely off the rails. Thought I’d just try off the rails and see how that went for once. Eh, what the heck. See you after.